Topic: Writing with Kids at Home?

[Karen Bly]

I'm just curious how many of you, if any, are able to write, or even just work on the computer, when your kids are home. Yesterday, I visited my son's friend's house. This family had both parents working from home--in a small condo--and their two sons were home (school closed that day). Their boys were 1st and 8th grade and the parents seemed to be getting lots done. This is nearly impossible in my house when my boys, first and fifth graders, are home. If I'm on the computer more than 15 minutes, there is a fracas that nearly always ends with them bursting into our tiny home office screaming and fighting. Sigh. Not that it matters, but I do leave the door open.

Is it possible to train your kids to let you get some work done while they're home? Is my family the anamoly or the family I visited? I should say, this was after I spent all day with my boys and they'd had dinner. So they certainly weren't starved for my attention, and it seemed like a potentially mellow time of day.

[kiperoo]

I'm home with my almost-5-year-old twins, and while I get the bulk of my good work in before they're up, while they're napping, or after they've gone to bed, I sneak in time in short bursts throughout the day--basically whenever they're independently occupied instead of playing or reading with me. My desk is right in our living room, which actually makes it easier to respond to their calls to put a dress on a doll or help find the right puzzle piece. It just means that I have to get used to working with constant interruptions, but it's surprising what you can get used to!

[MysteryRobin]

Karen - first off, I encourage you not to compare yourself to that family. You might have just caught them on a really good day! Also, that age split sounds pretty conducive to working from home.
My kids are 11, 7, and 4... there were times I could regularly write 1000 words a day while they were around. I'd turn a show on when they were little and knock it out during one cartoon or two.
Now, I could easily write around my 11 year old, but my 7 year old talks nonstop. Even when she thinks she isn't talking, she's reading poems to the cat or yelling at her stuffed animals. She just can't stop.
And my 4 year old boy always wants to show me something. So now I get up at 5:30 each morning to get writing done before they get up. I find I'm more at peace because I'm not trying to get writing in during the day and I can just focus on them and other stuff that needs doing.
Anyway - all that to say, I think each kid has ages that are easier or less easy to work when they're around, and it depends on the temperament of the kids. You can probably teach any kid to leave you alone to work, but it'll be a different cost to each kid...

[JennaWren]

Kip and Robin, I've always wondered how you got so much done! 

Karen, I'm sort of like you. I swear, my kids think all I do on the computer is goof off on FB, twitter and here! Last year, when DH was out of work, I vacated my office so he could have it, and relocated to the dining room table. The NEVER bothered him. But no matter where I'm camped out, they don't believe I'm actually doing any work and have no qualms about interrupting me.

All of my fiction writing is done after they go to bed, though now that all four are in school all day, I'm trying to use that time more productively (meaning, writing, not just chores and errands). Curious to hear about others' experiences!

[Karen Bly]

It's good to hear that I'm not the only one. I'll try not to think of that other family and their quiet, harmonious home life.  :snork

I was hoping to take on some freelance work, in addition to my fiction writing, and am now second guessing how much I can juggle, knowing my family. On the other hand, the boys are most quiet and mellow when I'm in the kitchen washing dishes. Perhaps I just need a recording of me washing dishes to assure them I'm busy in a way that they don't want to interrupt!

[JennaWren]

Perhaps I just need a recording of me washing dishes to assure them I'm busy in a way that they don't want to interrupt!

 :lol2 In my house it's the sound of the cleaning supplies that makes mine scatter!

[andracill]

I work from home (a paying job), and yes, there are times when it takes me at least twice as long as it should to accomplish something because the kiddos 'need' me.  They're 10 and almost 9, and although both are pretty self-sufficient, something often comes up.   I try to do most of my work (and any writing) while they're at school, since they're often wanting my attention when they get home.  If I really want to get something done (or need to), I'll shut the office door and tell them I *have* to work -- that usually works...for a while.

[Lill]

I have not read all the responses here. I home-school a 13 and 16 year old. Fortunately, they have their own computer. I have my laptop. My husband has his own as well.

I have been home-schooling for four or five years, I've lost track of time. I usually write early in the mornings, but then I run the risk of not handing out assignments until 10am ... or I write late at night .. and the quality and usefulness of the writing suffers.

I've trained myself to work with noise. With the exception of 2 1/2 school years .. I've ALWAYS had one or both of my sons home during the day. Now that they are teens, they can pretty much work independently, so ummm ... I write when there's a lull.

My husband comes home for lunch almost every day, and I tend to slip away into my bedroom and write while he's home.

My kids have always been sort of the self entertaining type though .. and they've always had each other.

[Artemesia]

I can't work on the computer when it's just me home with them as it's in a gated off area and I couldn't see what they are up to...but I frequently take my sketchbook or a notebook and work on the couch or in the yard while they play.

I can only work on the computer or paint on husband's days off. Unless I get up extra early while they are sleeping...which I haven't been able to do in some time. My butt's too heavy to drag out of bed lately. 

[jennygoebel]

My kids are 8,7, and 5 (all boys.) I was terrified when they started giving up their naps because that was the only time I could squeeze in any writing. So, I started replacing the soothing music I usually played at nap time with audio books. (Most libraries have a terrific selection.) I know it won't work for everyone, but I can even get my 8 year old to spend an hour or so listening to books on his CD player while he plays with Legos. Fights are drastically reduced, I think their reading/comprehension skills are improving, and I get some quiet time to do this 

[Karen Bly]

Ellm, that's a fantastic idea! Though they like different books, if I could get just one of them involved, it would help. The problems seem to come up more when they're together. And, like I said, a busy mom is an irresistable draw.

thanks for sharing all your experiences, Moms!

[crookedbook]

I have a five month old and a 2.5 year old - so they keep me quite busy! I try to write after they go to bed - the little one gets up at 5 so early morning is out, and they never nap at the same time. I have fantasies about when they are old enough to both be in school.

[JJwrites]

Crookedbook - I'm in the same boat as you. A 4 year old and a 7 month old (who also wakes at 5:00). Mornings are too early, and I'm too exhausted after bedtime. Not much writing going on in my house right now...

[Vijaya]

Karen, don't feel bad. It's hard for me to write with my kids around, esp. my daughter, because she has so much to talk about. They're a lot like Jenna's kids who scatter when it's time to clean house. So I save the household chores for when they're home so that we can do them together, and we can talk about stuff too. I do the bulk of my writing (and teaching) when my kids are at school. And yes, holidays and vacations are tough if I'm on deadline, but my husband is very helpful taking the kids out of the house.

Vijaya

[Mrs. Jones]

  Karen!

I remember the days when my kids were younger and it was difficult to take a shower, much less spend any time writing. And now that they're older, MUCH older, nothing has changed. They talk. A lot. To me, to each other, to their phones, to the wall, to the dogs, to the cat... Then there's the singing.

I love it when they're around but, for me, I've never been able to be productive with all the distractions. 

So I plan my writing around an empty house. And, as they get older, it gets emptier and emptier. The magic happens when they're gone, but it also happens when they're here. And I guess that's what it's all about, for me at least.

Things will get easier, writing-wise, sooner than you think! And you are not alone.

[Karen Bly]

Awww...Mrs. Jones, you've got me all verklempt. When you're in the thick of it, it feels like they'll always be this age...and then they grow up and leave you! Wah!

Love reading everyone's different methods of writing with kids. What an awesome group of writers on the BBs.

And, Vijaya, great idea to do the chores when they're close at hand to be helpful.